Thursday, April 11, 2013


life is never smooth sailing if life is smooth there will be no ups and downs that will make every step of your journey memorable.

despite all that I found myself strangely sadden Today. all it takes was a flick of a switch to turn on the negativity.. I should be blessed with what I have but yet .. I can't feel satisfied. all I felt was dosage of disappointment. everything that bothers me that I put aside just pours in.

I'm so lucky to have my dearie.Although I ha've to cry alone in office. but I know all it takes was one call and my dearie will comfort me. perhaps too many people think I'm happy go lucky I use tp cry alone in disappointment. honestly yes I feel a pang of jealousy when people's sadness was put priority of yours . what ? just because I do not show socially or publicly means I do not need to be comfort ? or is it just because I am strong enough to handle myself I don't have to be bothered ?

Afterall Im a girl all should be treated equally isn't it ? whether bf or no bf husband or no husband .. i guess I have to submit to fate .. there's no way anyone will treat me for the girl I am except for my dearie because he knows I'm v vulnerable at times and I need to be treated like a little girl. all I need was a hug. when I was single all I need to do was to whatsapp I need a hug to my poly friends majority and find Yh to grumble lol

without them I guess I wouldn't have gone through the downs that smoothly :) thats what friends are for I wouldn't trade it for anything. and yes dearie even if my friends won't be here all the time , you will be my friend, my lover, my soulmate,my husband to be, My everything :)

thanks for being there for me.
sign off Leila

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